In his dark room he is finally alone with spools of suffering set out in ordered rows. The only light is red and softly glows, as though this were a church and he a priest preparing to intone a Mass. Belfast. Beirut. Phnom Penh. All flesh is grass.
He has a job to do. Solutions slop in trays beneath his hands, which did not tremble then though seem to now. Rural England. Home again to ordinary pain which simple weather can dispel, to fields which don’t explode beneath the feet of running children in a nightmare heat.
Something is happening. A stranger’s features faintly start to twist before his eyes, a half-formed ghost. He remembers the cries of this man’s wife, how he sought approval without words to do what someone must and how the blood stained into foreign dust.
A hundred agonies in black and white from which his editor will pick out five or six for Sunday’s supplement. The reader’s eyeballs prick with tears between the bath and pre-lunch beers. From the aeroplane he stares impassively at where he earns his living and they do not care.
It’s hard to convey in a still image the feeling or atmosphere at a particular event. the shot below is purely random, I can’t remember taking it but it conveys the atmosphere created at Disco Kid, one of my biggest dance conventions in Blackpool Ballroom. I just like the feel, the dancers oblivious to the camera, judges all dressed up, A haze caught in the higher levels of the balconies, the spotlights shining.
“A movie director can manipulate time as a painter can manipulate the confluence of the events he depicts. Not so the still photographer. The only decision he can take is as regards the moment he chooses to isolate. This apparent limitation gives the photograph its unique power” (Berger and Dyer, 2001: 293)
Just a feeling, it’s temporary i know but it was with me all day yesterday. Twelve weeks since lockdown and it finally got to me. Today will be different, the new studio is coming on leaps and bounds, new camera arriving and lots of positives around. When it’s like this, it’s sometimes difficult to remember what you do have rather than what you do not.
This blog was created for a specific reason and will be used to document my new journey in conjunction with Falmouth University. Jumped clean out of my comfort zone as I tend to do. Hope you enjoy the journey.